Felix Dennis

Publisher

1947-05-27

Quotes by Felix Dennis

• The age of celebrity editors and monstrous staffing are over.

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• There is never a time in a company's history when cost control can be relegated to the back burner, but for a startup company, keeping costs low is a vital necessity.

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• You can actually be bored stiff while you're dying.

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• I never sue journalists. I employ journalists. I employ too many of them. I don't sue journalists.

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• It's a long, slow sunset for ink-on-paper magazines, but sunsets can produce vast sums of money.

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• I thoroughly object to getting old. If you could let me be 16 again, I'd give you everything I've got and everything I'll ever have.

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• The rich are not a contented tribe. The demands from others to share their wealth become so tiresome, so insistent, they often decide they must insulate themselves. Insulation eventually breeds a mild form of paranoia.

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• 'Great Expectations' has been described as 'Dickens's harshest indictment of society.' Which it is. After all, it's about money. About not having enough money; about the fever of the getting of money; about having too much money; about the taint of money.

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• Poetry is one of the oldest of all art forms, and one of its powers for shamans and tribal leaders was the mnemonic.

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• People who get trapped in the tunnel vision of making money think that is all there is to life.

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• People think I'm just an old Luddite, but that's untrue. I buy every new gizmo as it comes out, play with it until I understand how it works, and then give it away.

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• The vast majority of free verse is ghastly. Utterly ghastly. No one reads it. No one listens to it.

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• Computers are wasteful of paper and time. Once, we'd get documents with a few errors. Now, people make hundreds of copies until each sheet is flawless and memos are duplicated endlessly. Managers get swamped with emails.

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• Nobody could like Donald Trump, surely, except his mother. No one really likes The Donald. But how can you not have respect for a guy who's been down on the floor and just keeps coming back? Nothing will keep Donald Trump down until they drive a wooden stake in his heart and a silver bullet in his brain.

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• I am a born-again atheist, so there isn't going to be a funeral. I will be buried in a linen wrap in a cardboard coffin in my forest with an oak tree planted on my head.

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• Overhead will eat you alive if not constantly viewed as a parasite to be exterminated. Never mind the bleating of those you employ. Hold out until mutiny is imminent before employing even a single additional member of staff. More startups are wrecked by overstaffing than by any other cause, bar failure to monitor cash flow.

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• When I was young, I wanted to be the greatest blues singer of all time. I wrecked my education and left home for it.

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• Discourse has ended in America. It's all just shouting and ranting and demonization. Do you know how the rest of the world laughs at you guys? Have you got any idea? They're just rocking with laughter night and day.

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