Sid Waddell

Entertainer

1940-08-10

Books by Sid Waddell

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I'm the world's worst after-dinner speaker. I need pictures to respond to. I was the voice of the lottery balls once and got the sack.
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Well as giraffes say, you don't get no leaves unless you stick your neck out.
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Under that heart of stone beat muscles of pure flint.
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That was like throwing three pickled onions into a thimble!
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It's like trying to pin down a kangaroo on a trampoline.
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Golden rule of life: never underestimate your rivals.
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At various points, I've had a massive chip on me shoulder. I had fights about me accent with loads of those fellers you get from third-class public schools. They used to think I was speaking German.
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It's a form of mental and verbal gymnastics, and one of the things that appeals to me most about commenting on darts is that no one knows exactly what I'm going to come out with next - and neither do I.
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The atmosphere is so tense, if Elvis walked in, with a portion of chips... you could hear the vinegar sizzle on them.
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He's about as predictable as a Wasp on speed.
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When Alexander of Macedon was 33, he cried salt tears because there were no more worlds to conquer. Eric Bristow is only 27.
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I'm a postmodern commentator, and so, in a cheeky parallel to James Joyce or James Kelman, I get to places, verbally, that are a little unusual - when I talk about Jocky Wilson and end up sounding like a Jackson Pollock of the commentary box.
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