But the Egotist is stuck somewhere between his hidden triad of pride, fear, and insecurity; he is forever fighting to prove himself, instigating battles the Humbleman has unwittingly conquered, already sealed some time ago. Yes, the day he finally accepts face-to-face such an irony as humility - the irony that humility is indeed the mother of giants, that great men, having life so large, as needed, can afford to appear small - the world will then know peace.

A man can be called ruthless if he bombs a country to oblivion. A woman can be called ruthless if she puts you on hold.

Sacred cows make great hamburgers.

Our strength is often composed of the weaknesses we're damned if we're going to show.

The two biggest sellers in any bookstore are the cookbooks and the diet books. The cookbooks tell you how to prepare the food and the diet books tell you how not to eat any of it.

My father was often angry when I was most like him.

The lady with the answers does not have the answer to this one.

The only way to win a power struggle is to give it up.

Midgets are the last to know its raining.

You cannot control without being controlled.

How can I miss you if you never go away?

A $20 haircut hardly ever lasts longer than a $5 haircut.

You get your teeth fixed, your mouth doesn't work.

You write a hit play the same way you write a flop.

Being lost is worth the being found.

The trouble with unemployment is that the minute you wake up in the morning you're on the job.

It's almost as important to know what is not serious as to know what is.

Everything we say about other people is really about ourselves.

The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.

People think the Beatles know what's going on. We don't. We're just doing it.